~ I'm Sorry, I Can't Be Who You Want ~

I'm Sorry, I Can't Be Who You Want

I'm Sorry, I Can't Be Who You Want

I can't be who you want, I can't be who you need, I can't feel something you want me to feel, Not even if I pray for it on bended knees

I never wanted to hurt you, I'm afraid that you took the things that I said and did the wrong way. You fell in love with me. I fell in love with you. But our love for each other is in a different way

I love you because you are a good person. I love you as a friend. But I don't love you as you love me, It hurts so bad to have to tell you in this way. For I've already tried to tell you in other ways. But you only see things as you want it to be. Not as the way I've tried to convey, To you in so many ways

At first I thought things could be as you wanted it to be. In fact at the beginning for it I hoped and prayed. That I could be to you, And you could be to me, What we both have been looking for in someone along our life's path way. But then things got in the way

It started as you believing in me. And all that I did and say. Well that is what you tried to make me believe, In the things you would say. Your doubt's soon appeared, That you tried to hide with your fears. You let someone that you called a friend to interfere

A friend you listen to, And believed that all that friend said had to be true. That i'm not who I say I am. You said that I needed to prove things to you. That made the faith I had in you, To believe I am the real me, Turn out to be a lie that you once said to me, That you believed in me. As I believed in you

My feelings started to fade, I never wanted to have to tell you in this way. But the thought of hurting you made me afraid. You saw it all coming. You started to see me running the other way. You pushed me to the limits with your doubts and accusations that hurt me in a bad way

If your love for me was true, I shouldn't have had to prove anything to you. I'm a woman who worships God. He is the only one that I should have to prove anything too. And not even he whom I know his love for me is true. Ever made me feel that I had anything about me to have to prove

My faith and love in him. And his faith and love in me, As being all that we wanted each other to be. Is the greatest love of all. That is why I worship him, Live my life for him. You could have been a part of what I have with him

But I'm afraid that your doubts, And your lack of faith in who I am, Kept me from loving you, The way that you wanted me too. For never once did I doubt you. Until you let me know of your doubts in me

You said things are different now. Yes they are. But not in the way that you think, That it is from where you are. I lost my trust in you. I lost my faith in you. Now I have a fear of you

Sending me gifts can't make up for your not believing me, To be the person at the beginning that I have alway's been, And always will be. The gift's I never asked for them. I told you not to send them.The gift's didn't make me feel good. They made me feel guilt for something that I can't give to you, The kind of love that you want me too

What could have been. Can never be. I pray that you understand why this all came to be. I never wanted to hurt you, Or for you to hurt me. This poem is the only way that I believe that I could get you to see

For I can't bare the thought of hurting you. There is nothing you or I can do. To change the feelings that I have for you. Which is just as a friend. But a friend who gave me fear. Of the thought of you coming near. Because I can't tell you what you long to hear. For I can't be with someone who has given me fears, Enough to have caused me tears

I'm Sorry, I Can't Be What You Want I Can Only Be Me, Why Couldn't You Have Believed In Me? It's Too Late To Much Time Has Past By, Can't You See

"I'm Sorry"
That I Had To Tell You In This Way

By_Arlene R. Szynal

Copyright January 11, 2001 All Rights Reserved

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